Almost There

We're in Tokyo, waiting for our flight to Beijing. The last flight was sooo long! The girls did great- watched a couple of movies, slept, and played games. I'm just ready to get to our hotel and get to bed.



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Location:Narita,Japan

Perspective

Until last week, I had looked at adoption as something we were doing. It was a family thing, something we felt led to do, but not a public spectacle. Perry and I have been praying for our family, and focusing on Mollie and Sarah and Abby. But as the day has drawn closer, my perspective has been changed. I've been telling my story, and in the process I've discovered that our community, not just our family, is adopting this child. Our friends and family are praying for our trip, and lining up to help us in every way imaginable. It's amazing to feel God's love that He is so clearly showing us through others. We are so blessed.

Getting Ready

We finally have Sarah's new room finished (except for some artwork on the walls), and Mollie's room is ready (again, except for artwork). I've been shopping for Mollie clothes, and warm clothes for the rest of us to wear in Beijing. I've bought gifts for nannies and guides, toys to put in Mollie's backpack, and surprises for the airplane ride. I have snacks and medicines packed. I'm getting organized for our housesitter, visiting the bank (multiple times) for crisp $100 bills to exchange in China, and planning doctor appointments for Mollie. And throughout it all, I'm praying, and asking friends for prayers.
Today I'm feeling calm, but yesterday I was a wreck. I think that much of my anxiety is due to the trip itself, rather than the addition of a new family member. Just taking the family to China for  16 days is stressful. When we go to DisneyWorld, I plan for months, and know our itinerary like the back of my hand. But this trip is out of my control. We will do what our guides tell us to do. It will be planes, trains, and automobiles, and it will be exhausting. I worry about Sarah and Abby, and how they will handle the demands of adoption travel. I worry about me, and how I'll handle not being in control.
And yes, I am also anxious about Mollie. Will she accept us? Will we be able to communicate? How are our lives going to change, and are we prepared for those changes?
I'm so thankful that I have my faith - God brought us to this point, and He is the one in control. I just need to surrender to him. He's got this.

If We Are the Body

Perry and I have always said that someday we would probably adopt. We didn’t know when, or how, or even why, but we both felt it was something we would do…eventually. So last September, when I suggested that we attend an adoption information session, he wasn’t surprised. We left that meeting with complete confidence that we were about to have another child, and we began to follow our red thread.  For over a year, we waded through the process, with document chasing, homestudy questions, required readings, and lots and lots of waiting. Mostly waiting. But now, finally, we can see the light at the end of the tunnel. We have Travel Approval and will be traveling SOON!

I’m feeling excited and a little anxious. I’ve had this feeling before, at other momentous occasions. I felt it when I was driving to Austin for graduate school, and later to Los Angeles to start a new job. I felt it as I was getting ready to walk down the aisle to marry Perry, and again when I was lying in the hospital bed about to become a mother to twins. All of those moments felt like this: uncertain, overwhelming, life-changing. But all of those moments also proved to be the best things I ever did, and they are the events that I think define my life. I believe that we’re supposed to do things that scare us, and take us out of our comfort zone. That’s how we grow as people, and that’s how we grow in faith.

We have so many uncertainties with Mollie. How serious is her CP? What therapies will she need? Will she readily accept us as her family, and love us as we love her, or will she struggle to bond? How will Sarah and Abby adjust to having a new little sister? How will I handle having to give up my activities and free time in order to bond with her? Yes, I’m anxious. But I’m not scared, because I have complete faith that God will provide us with the support we need to get us through it all. Lately the song I’ve been singing in the shower is “If We Are the Body.” His arms ARE reaching: our community is gathering around us, lifting us up, and providing us with the support we need to do what we are called to do. It’s a God thing, for sure.

We have much to do. Travel arrangements, packing, painting and organizing 3 rooms. But all of that will get done. I just pray that she’s getting prepared, too. Because we’re coming. And we have a lot of loving to do.

 

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Steps to TA

DTC 8/25/11
LID 9/13/11
LOA 10/28/11
I800 receipt 11/10/11
I800 approved 12/1/11
NVC Cable 12/8/11
Article 5 Pickup 12/23/11
TRAVEL APPROVAL 1/5/12

Another Step in the Process

Yesterday we received our I-800A approval. We have been waiting since May 24th, and the wait has been brutal. I've been praying for patience and speed!
We still have many steps and long waits, but we are one step closer to Mollie.

Pre-Approval

We have been officially matched!
As I wrote in my last post, we had placed a little girl on hold in order to get more information about her. Unfortunately, as difficult as it was, we decided to take her off hold. Her medical needs were very serious, and we felt it was too much for our family. Letting her go was hard - we had prayed for her every night - but we knew that she was in God's care and that the right family would find her.
In the process of getting more information about her, we were sent a few videos of another little girl. While these new videos were sent to us "accidentally," we know that this was God's plan all along. This precious girl is a little younger, which fits our family better, and her medical needs are mild. We immediately placed her on hold, sent her files in for review, and continued to pray.
Today we received our PA, or pre-approval, for her adoption. We have a new daughter!

Yay!

All of my CANs have been received, and our Homestudy is complete! I've filled out the I800A and will take that to our agency today. Real progress.
We still have a little girl on hold, trying to get more information. We're reviewing her medical files and have requested updated photos and video. I feel like we need to make this decision soon - I actually already told the girls that this wasn't the right little girl for our family, so I feel torn every day. My prayers are that she is being loved and cared for, and that she find her forever family quickly - whether that is us or another family. It is in God's hands.
 Jeremiah 29:11 “I know the plans I have for you," declared the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.”.

Making Progress

Our Homestudy is in final review, although it's still missing CANs (Child Abuse and Neglect clearances) from two states. Some things are just really slow, and I'm trying to appreciate these lessons in patience! So, even though this stage isn't totally complete yet, it does feel like we've finally made significant progress and are on our way to finding our little girl.
We have actually placed a hold on one little girl on the Special Focus list. We have a lot of questions about her file, but I'm confident that God will provide those answers clearly and quickly so that we will be able to make an informed decision. I'm at peace about the process, because I know that our little girl is in China waiting for us to find her, and God is directing our path.
I strongly believe that the lengthy paperwork process is important for teaching us to remain calm, vigilant, and patient. The road is rocky, and filled with many forks and dead ends. By learning to negotiate the paperwork, we are learning to trust in the process and not let our emotions take over when faced with decisions and challenges. All very important lessons.

Step Two

Last week we had our final interview for our Home Study. This process is long, frustrating, difficult, and even scary at times. But we're working through it, taking it at our own pace, and learning so much along the way. We still have a long way to go, and the paperwork continues to seem insurmountable, but it feels like we're finally in the second trimester. We're talking about it more, telling our friends what we're doing and praying for our new little girl every day.
The next step is to finish the paperwork and assemble our Dossier. I hope we'll get this completed in the next month.